Monday, October 02, 2006

Ooh well I thought I'd be the first one to report being it's quite far away from 3 o'clock but not so. I've yet again underestimated Clemetine's complete boredom at work. [Note: will try and make you word search before Tuesday RMM meeting- remind me]

So I my weekend will be described as The Pretty Woman Moment with the subhead of I Want to Serially Burn all DSWs to the Ground.

On Saturday being that it was rainy which ruined my idea of going to the VA Wine Festival I decided that I would go to the Priscilla of Boston's Trunk Show in Tyson's to try on some dresses. I was all psyched being as trying on dresses is obviously the pinnacle of my all time favorite game: dress up. So I hop in the car with my directions wearing my black jersey dress and china doll slipper in anticipation of easy on - easy off dressing room experience [which is a normal change from my insane happenstance of ALWAYS wearing my giant boots etc to dressing room causing me to fall all over the place while trying to disrobe].

Now pulling up to the complex with an Hermes, Louis Vitton, and Tiffany's made me slightly wish I had rethought the china doll slippers but I was wearing my cute corderoy jacket I got from H&M a couple of years ago that I get compliments on so I *hoped* they brought me back to even.

Let me now say that I thought that "trunk show" was high class code for "sale" which is my favorite non-swear 4 letter word. So I walk in and there are giant dresses on racks but it's not a huge store. I'd say there are like 6 racks with 8 dresses on them each and 4 other racks that were PACKED with bridesmaids dresses. So I wander around and am eavesdropping on the woman behind the counter and someone who's buying a dress and just getting the feel of the place. The feel of the place is by the way, hella expensive, as the location would denote. $4000 is not in my dress budget. So do a lap around the store taking everything. Then another lap. And another. And another and pass some clerks. See some people in these giant dressing rooms but they're not all full. Do another lap. Still no one asking me if I want to try anything on. At one point have to get out of the way of a clerk getting a dress behind me. About 10 minutes have passed. Show interest in a dress. Look at it from all angles. Check it out-- AND NOTHING.

At this point I'll mention that the fiance is generally scared to go shopping with me because I get accosted by sales people everywhere I go. EVERYWHERE. But not here. Not when I'm all psyched to try on wedding dresses. So I take another couple of laps and make sure to fix my hair, my jacket, my makeup all with my left hand as to say -- LOOK AT MY RING! THERE IS NO WAY YOU CAN'T! TRY AND SELL ME A GODDAMN DRESS! But still nothing. Estrogen surge and hormone imbalance occurs at the same time that the thought rushed into my head that this is just like Pretty Woman and I leave the store and go cry in my car.

Call Mom, continue crying then set out for DSW #2.

I am looking for a shoe. A very particular BCBG style PL-ANKARA in cobalt blue size 9 and half (don't even get my start on the fact that my feet are apparently still growing or BCBG can kiss my ass) which they didn't have at DSW by me. So I went to the one in Falls Church which had my size in black but not blue. So I went to Silver Spring. Only two shoes left and in a size 7. Around this time I start mumbling about arson.

Saturday night I go to the townie bar to relieve stress from earlier in the day. Lose the game of pool on the last f-ing ball as usual but get the TWO top spots in photo hunt so it's ok.

Sunday we head out to Crystal City to DSW and they didn't even have the fucking shoe. I'm given ice cream to calm down.

So that's my weekend. Although I did get to sleep in so it wasn't so bad. There really is no good way to end this story.


Blogger Scarlett said...

Did you tell those stupid high end retailing bitches who you are? They better recognize!!!

4:28 PM  

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