Jake Shears Made Me All Wet!
Get your minds out of the gutters. I mean he literally soaked me upon throwing his water bottle out in the crowd at last night's Scissor Sisters concert in Nash-Vegas, baby! Rhett and I were prolly 7 people deep from the stage. The venue was almost exactly like the 9:30 Club w/o the balcony. I would have drunk dialed you guys from the concert, but I didn't have your numbers programmed into my phone. That will be remedied shortly.
Since Jake is like my Gemini twin, I thought it would be fun to do a side by side comparison. Check it:
- Jake likes cute boys; I like cute boys
- Jakes loves sequins; I love sequins
- Jake is a rockstar; I pretend to be a rockstar when I sing with the radio
- Jake once worked as a stripper; I once worked as a stripper (well, not so much "worked" as a stripper, but I always positioned myself near the pole on the Metro during my daily commute.)
- Jake used to live in KY; I live in KY
- Jake goes by a nom de plume; I go by a nom de plume
- Jake has blonde highlights; I have blonde highlights
There was an attendant positioned in the ladies room. She squirted soap into my hand and passed me a paper towel. And for this I had to tip her a buck. Now, I'm not sure what is the tipping etiquette for this kind of situation. Anyone know? It's not like I took advantage of the complimentary hairspray or mouthwash. There were cigarettes available too, but I'm guessing they weren't free. Is straight up handwashing a buck? What if you go more than once? Is it a buck a visit or does one buck buy you all the handwashing you need? Handwashing seems, to me, to be an initmate act and I, for one, am not really comfortable with her standing all up in my business.
Due to poor planning on my part we left for Nash-Vegas around 4:30 p.m. without having dinner. We expected to find a restaurant where we could eat before the show. We arrived into town with only an hour to spare so we decided to eat at the chi chi restaurant next door to the venue. After cocktails were ordered we looked at the menu to find everything was ceviche, crab cakes and other seafood-y stuff. Rhett doesn't really do seafood unless Captain D's batters and fries the hell out it. Even I couldn't find something to eat from this menu. So, we opted to stick to cocktails only. At the show I had three more drinks on an empty stomach, Charly wisely didn't drink. If you're counting, that's 4 cocktails all with generous pour on an empty stomach. We hit McDonald's on our way out of town. Needless to say I scarfed my food down, which resulted in hiccups. These hiccups have returned this morning. It's really starting to [hiccup] piss me [hiccup] off!
-Scarlett
posted by Scarlett | 10:36 AM
2 Comments:
in the attendant situation i prefer to take the moral high road and act like a drunk college freshmen from idaho. to perform this elaborate dance you must unfocus your eyes, muss up your hair (if you are me this is a given without any action taken), sway slightly when you walk, and generally pretend that you think this woman is just being really nice without wanting a tip. I also like to say "oh thank you!" slightly surprised in a southernish accent to convey niceness and innocence. no one has caught on yet that people from idaho don't speak with southern accents either! it's really quite incredible.
Thanks for the tip Mrs. Darcy. I'll employ this method in the future.
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