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Clementine, could you reference your handy dandy urban dictionary and find the accepted spelling of fru fru / frou frou / froo froo?

Heading to STL tonight for my sister-in-law's housewarming party. I've been asked to utilize my mad mix tape skillz. Since I didn't know who my audience is going to be I had to wing it. So I got a little Peaches, Sharon Jones, Enon. It's a crazy cool mash up of all the stuff the kids are listening to these days.

Speaking of mix tapes, Darcy and Margeaux I got some ideas to give your wedding receptions some indie cred.

Scarlett

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So Popodopalous took a breathalizer last night... Methinks there's a story behind that. Perhaps the next happy hour could be within the confines of our nation's capital because a 2 hour trip ride from work to clarendon back into dc then back out to maryland just ain't doin it for me. And if not for me- think of Scarlett. It's a 2 hour drive to STL then a 4 hour flight to Reagan and a quick hop into the city on the metro. Don't make her fly into Dulles. Dulles sucks. 66 traffic... You are really cruel people.

So it's settled. District next time. Excellent.

Let me also note for those office workers out there that typing out your blog entry in entourage or whatever work sponsored email client they give you is a fabulous idea. The big boss just came and sat down next to me and it was like - whatevs. Look how hard I'm working. Look at this intense email I'm sending. I deserve a raise.

On the complete opposite end of the fishing scale I was thinking of going to Tysons with a billy club and brass knuckles and going to a bridal trunk sale if anyone wants to come. I usually only break out the billy club for victoria secret semi annual sales to beat down on all the other 34Bs who try and go after MY STUFF but I feel that those may only have been practice for the bridal trunk shows. You know, weddings are special like that, needing brute force. WHICH reminds me of the idea for my other handle- Princess Buttercup which just sounded a little too fru-fru. Or is it froo-froo? Hm.

I also believe the VA Wine Fest is this weekend as well as the Crafty Bastards Renegade Craft Fair. Lofty idea- I know especially since I just worked out the odds (on my imaginary calculatory) and there's a 57% chance that all I'll do this weekend is spend a half an hour cleaning my crack house of an apartment then get drunk on the last of our box wine and miller light and end up watching a law&order/closer/ANTM/project runway haze interjected with the 3 netflix movies we've had for well over a month now.

Yeah I'm totes Jane Austen classy.

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So today is my last day at my current job. Already the IT department has come by and copied all my files for my boss. I was not allowed to do another quick search of the files to make sure there was nothing personal left. After 3 1/2 years why do I feel like I'm being treated like a criminal? Are they going to escort me from the building later too? What could I possibly want to take or get rid of? Not really sure why I'm here today. There is nothing for me to do and I guess I'll spend the next hour until lunch working on wedding planning stuff. At least I have time to do that I suppose.

Heading home to the midwest tonight for my 10 year reunion tomorrow. Little nervous about that. I have to stay in a hotel because I no longer have a home since my mom sold her place. Not sure what to expect tomorrow night. Think I'll just drink a lot. Perhaps I should take advice from Clementine and be a more cautious drunk. Although, you may all get drunk phone calls from me if there is anything worth telling.

I guess I'm pretty boring today. Ready to get this show on the road and get out of here. Really taking all my self control to not tell tweedledum that I think she's a complete idiot. I would feel good for about 5 minutes if I did and then because I do have a conscious I would probably feel bad. I think those 5 minutes are worth it though. She has made me crazy for the last 4 months and I so will not miss her. Ok, enough of my rant. Have a good weekend!

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The Breathalyzer

So while out enjoying some libations with Vanilla Bear and Funi, my phone rang- it was my dad. Since I am a better daughter than Petra, I picked up. After I was done talking I thought it would be fun to see how tipsy I really was. According to the breathalyzer at the bar, I had a blood alcohol level of 0.25%. Now we all know that the legal limit for most states is only 0.08%.
So what does this mean? Well according to some website:

"All mental, physical, and sensory functions are severely impaired. You're emotionally numb. There's an increased risk of asphyxiation from choking on vomit and of seriously injuring yourself by falling or other accidents."

Well I didn't fall or choke, there was however some drunk commenting on myspace. While this is not as bad as drunk dialing, it may be problematic for me. As you know, Fri night boy is now my "friend". Now when I wake up I have to check my phone for calls/texts as well as myspace.

So what have I learned from last night? If I have a blood alcohol level of 0.25%, true my mental, phsyical, and sensory functions are impaired, but rather than an increased chance of falling or choking, there is an increased chance of drunk emailing/calling/texting/myspacing.

So the moral of this story my friends is not to drink less, but be more responsible when drunk. Hide your phones and laptops.

Have a good weekend :-)

Clem

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Two nights ago I saw the most exciting movie trailer for a girl like me who loves period films and all things aristocratic. Sofia Coppola has brought France's Marie Antoinette to the big screen starring Kirsten Dunst. Can't wait for it's Oct 20th release. I'm sure the costumes will be nominated for an Oscar, which brings me to my point, Oscar parties.

You know how everyone seems to own one party that is their's alone and you wouldn't think of infringing on your friend's glory? Well, I actually stole the rights to host the Oscar party from a friend. She asked me if she could host it at my house one year due to her having recently moved to an apartment w/o proper accomodations for even a small gathering. From that year forward the Oscar party was hosted by me, much to her dismay. This is not a friendly thing to do. Does this unfriendly action equate to sleeping with one's husband? No, but she holds a grudge nonetheless. My friend and I have both moved away. I have a new set of neighbors and friends with an established party schedule, Halloween costume parties, Holiday parties, New Year's Eve brunches... As this party season approaches I promise to be a better / friendlier version of me. I will not repeat my selfishness w/ my new acquaintences, no matter how much better I think I could host. I can sit smug when a host plays bad 90's power ballads on crappy speakers, but I must not reveal my smugness, for that is not a friendly thing to do. I can even sit sumg when crappy frou frou girly drinks made from Blue Curacao are offered to me, but I vow to drink it, heck I'll even promise to sway to whatever crappy Matchbox 20 tune happens to be playing, because that is the friendly thing to do. No one currently holds an Oscar party, so I got dibs. I might even get a red carpet this year.

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I was thinking about going fishing this weekend. With the cool weather i imagine that they'll be biting pretty good. pa told me to put the kettle on....oh sorry...slipped into laura ingles wilder there for a mintue.

how come when i am writing this i feel like doogie houser with the internal dialgoue going on? does that go away? nope still happening.

anyway, clementine just sent me link to breathalizer results, appaerntly I should have been near a coma last night.

so here's my thought for this moment - annoying people really annoy me.

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Good lord that's green!

I'm here too!!