3 o'clock candy

Friday, November 30, 2007


Despite have way more to do in the last week than the past month or two I have been trolling the web for my next Moby Dick of fashion. Moby Dick of fashion you ponder quietly to yourself. Yes, you read right. Every several months I become obsessed with something and cannot find it anywhere despite searching high and low. Half the time I finally find one only to have store PLASTER them everywhere only a month after I have my precious conquest making it totally less cool. To prove my point previous Moby Dicks include rugby shirt in the late 90s. I finally bought an extra large children's size because it was all I could find. Three months later- enter Abercrombie. Galoshes about 6 years ago. I saw a small child with some very old school green galoshes with little eyes on them making it look like a wee froggy. Adorable. Went to every website possible but there's no giant children sizes that would fit my size 9 toboggan feet so I settled with my yellow ones only to have the whole friggin' world go galosh crazy about 3 weeks later. Fuckers. Then there is the whole jersey dress fiasco. Search for 3 summers for a nice easy to maintain summer dress. Now you can dress you and you family entirely in jersey all 4 seasons thank you American Apparel. [editor's note: American Apparel's jersey is not all that and a bag of chips despite the rage surrounding them] Now there is no glory in wanting something about 5 minutes before the rest of the world. There's no job to be had in that b/c honestly the people who get those crazy jobs know about 10 minutes before me and have capabilities like SEWING and whatnot that make having these things possible. I just whine and get frustrated. Oh and I'm not willing to spend more than $50 to get what I want so it's not like I can go "Oh I'll just buy a DVF wrap dress to satisfy my jersey dress reqs" No. Don't have an extra $350 to blow. Which brings us to now. Looking for the next cool thing and you know what I'm finding? Some hideous fucking shit. I knew it was coming down the pipeline but did we really need to delve into the horrors of the 80s so deeply. Last night Mr. Darcy and I went to a Michael Ian Black show and I saw a girl in a black and white hounds tooth cropped jacket with a white (most likely denim) mini skirt with blood red opaque tights and black knee high boots. Mr. Darcy was as aghast as I. Let me also note this chicky was no Kate Moss. I have a healthy respect for my junk in the trunk and that why I only own one mini-skirt and it's a size too big (it was $5 on a sale rack at American Eagle a year and a half ago where I was searching for layering tanks [which I found as well for $2 each] and it's a nice dark wash which I feel minimizes any negative ass and I'm 27 [not 28* as I mistakenly told Mr. Darcy {soberly} two nights ago] so i still feel it's within my rights). White miniskirts do not minimize any junk in the trunk. So I was about to share my findings of horrible clothes with Clem when I realized I should share with everyone.

Exhibit A: VS. I flipped through the stack of (no joke) 15 VS magazine that litter my parents house with my sister's dog ears and torn out page everywhere. It's xmas list time, after all. I was SHOCKED AND OUTRAGED at some things I saw. Thankfully I don't believe my sister dog earred any of these disasters.
SERIOUSLY?!!?!? SERIOUSLY VICTORIA'S SECRET?!?!?! When shit don't look good on the models I think that means something!! Firstly. Advocating a boxy jacket with a cropped top and a high wasted skirt WITH PLEATED?!?!? Has my head exploded yet?!?! HAS IT!?!?! Pleats. P-L-E-A-T-S. Ok second- AGAIN WITH THE CROPPED SHIRT HIGH PANTS?! Now. The pants I give a slight pass to. They should come with a large warning. Something like- you may look like a fat sailor in these and they will be really uncomfortable to sit in. And ruffles on knits.... wow. The last... eh. It's bad but not as other two but really is large tshirts something we want to revisit again?! When you make the model look vaguely preggers it's not a good look.

Exhibit B: Urban Outfitters. Lordy lordy lordy. The titles speak for themselves: "Lux High Waist Pleat Short", "Cheap Monday Jogging Pant". For shits and giggles here are what those titles go to:

To burn your retinas go to the "skirts" section. That little knit number is just the beginning of the insanity.

People are bothering me to actually do work today so I'll just MENTION baby doll dresses. WHY?!!?!? First of all- it's winter. Too cold for babydoll dresses. Secondly, didn't those swing tops already remind us that tenting doesn't hide anything?

Lastly a short note to J. Crew. Dear J. Crew, you have consistently great clothes and although there is nothing I specifically love in your collection I feel if you send me a large selection of your clothing I could be more informed. Kisses!! TFMD

*Not that 28 is too old to wear mini skirts. I think that 35 is a good marker that the ship has sailed except if you're Paulina Porizkova.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Whew...I don't have mouth cancer!

Ok, not that I really thought that I did, but you can never be too sure.

So last weekend on my drive home, my tooth/gum felt weird. Slightly sore. So while driving (I was pretty much in bumper to bumper traffic) I try to take a look. What I saw made me nervous. It was a hole, like an divet. I don't remember losing piece of my gum, so I am convinced I have a flesh eating cancer. Super. Google told me it was probably just my wisdom tooth. However, according to Google, you normally get them by your early 20s. I'm not in that catagory, sadly.

I called the dentist to make an appointment. After gagging on the damn x-rays, the awful water pick, and horrendous metal things, I get to see the Dentist.As it turns out, Google was right. It's my wisdom tooth coming in.

What I wasn't prepared for was the fact that the dentist couldn't do anything more than say, "Yup. It's a wisdom tooth. You should probably get that taken out"
Um...this is why I came to YOU. YOU should take it out. Turns out, you have to go to an oral surgeon. Who knew? Now, I have my appointment (consultation)with the surgeon.
I think the referrals stop there. But I clearly new to this whole procedure...so any insight would be great so I don't look like a complete ass!


Monday, November 26, 2007

Well, I guess I would be the only one to not have met Cam.

Today I basked in an afternoon nap after a very late night photoshoot and a very early morning darkroom session. I got some great shots, but unfortunately, the lighting produced difficult to print shots, but if I can make them work they'll be great for my class portfolio. I continued on with the Mod theme. And now I feel like listening to epic Bond themes.

Now, I wait for Rhett to finish up. We're going to purchase a new showerhead. We'll replace the leaky one for hopefully a non-leaky one, thus saving us the aggrivation of sopping gallons of water with our specially designated "floor towels" which are NEVER to be confused with our bath towels. See what potential house guests have to contend with?

Ah 100 year old houses!


Yes, Virginia, There is a Santa Claus - I mean Cam

So last Tuesday I ventured out to Arlington to meet up with Clem for a "I don't have to work tomorrow" happy hour even though I did have to work the next day - well at least until noon. It was great to see Clem as the last time I saw her was several months ago - I remembered that it had been since my wedding but I've forgotten again - oh wait- it just came back to me - it was at Popodop's (remember her? she never blogs anymore) surprise birthday part. Clem was sneaky and got me and Mr. K to come out by holding happy hour at one of Mr. K's favorite restaurants - Rhodeside grill - he can't get enough of their buffalo chicken tenders and will jump at any chance to go there since it used to be our default restaurant to go to until we moved to the burbs. Yes, I know that Arlington is technically the burbs but it's got nothing on Fairfax. Anywho, I digress. So, Mr. K and I head to Rhodeside for happy hour and Clem promised me that there would be a special attraction at this happy hour. One I had been looking forward to seeing for quite some time now. Which brings us to the title of this post - I finally got to meet Cam. For those of you who have met him several times, you'll have to excuse my excitement as this was the first time I met him. I found him to be a very nice looking man and he and Mr. K had plenty to talk about with their military backgrounds. It was hard at times to tear him away from the Florida basketball game but I won't hold that against him. It'll be hard to tear me away from the Packers/Cowboys game on Thursday which I am really really excited and a tiny bit nervous for. So, I got to meet the illusive Cam and was most impressed when he asked Miss Clem what she had eaten that day. Apparently he caught on rather quickly that our friend Clem likes to drink on an empty stomach - something Popodop does too. So, with both of us giving her a little bit of shit for that, she finally relented and ordered french fries. Anyway, I'm talking about all sorts of stuff here but the big deal is that I got to meet Cam and I found him to be completely normal and a nice guy. I was pretty impressed over all.

All of that aside, Thanksgiving has come and gone and I really need to get moving on my Christmas shopping. I have bought one gift so far and have no idea what else to get for anybody. Any ideas??? I have to buy for my mom, Mr. K's younger sister and her husband and Mr. K's parents. Other than that, I don't have a lot to say. I have no motivation to work so I am trying to kill as much time as possible right now before I can leave in 30 minutes. But, since I've run out of things to say, and don't want to bore you with my whining about going home and working out and how I really don't want to, I shall call it a day and play some spider solitaire. Adios!

Sunday, November 25, 2007

I thought I'd give a little blog love to a new band I love:

The Virgins

Check 'em out and remember, you heard hear it first!

Peace Out,
Official 3:00 Candy Music Editor

Friday, November 23, 2007

In preparation of a test to resolve blood pressure issues, I'm required to eat salt, a LOT of salt, for three days. Salt on my potatoes, salt on my eggs, salt on my popcorn, salt in my water. SALT SALT SALT. After 36 hours of this diet I am averse to salt.

My mouth is puckered and dry and I haven't peed in a while.

In other non-TMI news, my father-in-law didn't like the butternut squash soup. I could tell when he ate two bites and got up from the table to "carve the turkey." For the record, that GD soup was not only a gorgeous yellowy-orange served simply in a white bowl with sugar cinnamon crouton (homemade) but it tasted like butternut friggin' squash only more concentrated with a hint of cinnamon and nutmeg, to put it another way, it was Autumn in a friggin' Ikea bowl.

Neither did he eat the homemade cranberry and orange relish. Why? Why? Why I ask, do I slave in the kitchen to impress guests who would rather eat out of their laps watching the Packers game? Oh well, I'll do it again next year and the year after that.

So, it is unusual that we actually spent Thanksgiving with the 'rents. When I asked why they didn't treck to Wisconsin they told me that their gay nephew was bringing his boyfriend and his parents were just having immediate family to dinner. I cracked up. I had NO idea that the 'rents had a gay nephew so I stirred the pot by saying:

"I LOVE gay people"

and when they qualified that this nephew was extra effeminate I said:

I LOVE "femmy" gays"

Ha I love it!

The 'rents left and Rhett and I fell into bed to sleep off the starch that repeated throughout the mainly beige Holiday meal. We then headed to the theatre where we had a show. I had to welcome the audience and do the sound effects. The show is a comedy with two actors playing all the inhabitants of a fake town in Texas, and it's actually a brilliant satire made even more funny with the men wearing dresses to portray female characters. Yep, nothing says Thanksgiving like a drag show about Christmas!

And that was Thanksgiving in the O'Hara household.


Tuesday, November 20, 2007


So, I may not have informed everyone of the oddness that was my neighbor's Halloween party. But I should provide the background for why I'm weirded out. Here's the dealio:

The 28 yr old widow who sold us our house was acting strange (innebriation could be the explaination, but this was wierd) She kept referring to Big Love and suggesting that if she married Rhett she could live in her former house. Then she mentioned repeatedly that she reads my MySpace blog and found me funny and random. She derived much from the snippets of my revealed self, most of which was some projection of herself onto me. She made me quite uncomfortable when she proceeded to hit on all the married men at the party, which weren't too many in numbers, but statistically speaking she was batting 100, or is it 1000? I don't know, you get the idea....but the real kicker, the piece de resistance came when she offered to be our surrogate mother.

Ummm, thanks, but really all our positions are full. I'll keep your application in the circular file.

So tonight the widow commented on a MySpace photo of my new dark hair. This is the first contact I've had with her in a month and I'm wierded out. How do you break up with an aquiantence you only have because you bought her house and she's kinda crazy and definitely a substance abuser and you feel bad for her because she had a horrible tragedy that seems to be defining her future, but at the same time you don't want to be around her because she makes you weep uncontrollably and around strangers at a party that you just want to leave but you can't find a polite way to exit because you live next door and you're expected to liven the party attended by people you would never hang out with under any other circumstances because they look at you like you have two heads because you brought hummus and they don't know what that is and therefore refuse to try it and so you're just hoping that the nerdy / slightly uppidity neighbors from two houses down will make their obligatory appearance so that you have at least one person with whom you can talk to about anything other than dick jokes and crude sexual innuendo, but the innuendo-ers don't know that word so....

Umm, can you tell I miss you guys?

Monday, November 19, 2007

TMFD, I need your George Washington "He saves children, but not the British children" link. That one line has been running through my head non-stop today, but I can't find it.

Hi everyone!

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Son of a bitch.

So some of you may know i'm watching my 15 (nearly 16) year old sister this week while my mom is in Italy. Now i'm not sure who i ranted to when but i recently saw some suspect pictures on her facebook and some blatant mention of drug use (weed) and drinking on her friends myspace so i've been worried and on friday i had a mini melt down (it was the first day) and did a little "investigatory work" in her room. I didn't come across much. A lighter- quasi-circumspect- and an empty water bottle that vaguely smelled of mint/alcohol (which also could have been my mom's mint lip balm) but other than that nothing. So i've been trying to subtly bring up important topics but, as i've said, it's hard to tell someone that they're too young to do too much when the person in question thinks they're an adult (which she is not).

And with all of this how do I end up teaching my sister how to snap bottle caps!?!? It probably went down something like this: she tried to flick a water bottle cap at me but how you'd flick away a bug or something so I said "Give me the cap" and then show her what I can do and she thinks it's the greatest thing ever and wants me to show her how to do it. I figure at least it would be a good way to broach the subject.

ANYHOO in other news I took our dog out for a walk and when we (mostly sister) got back noticed ticks on her and picked like 10 ticks off and since I've been sleeping in the bed the dog sleeps in (it's a people bed for the record- not a doggie bed) and I've been taking her for walks all week I'm terrified that I now have lyme disease as well. Aforementioned sister checked my scalp and I'm scalp clean but now I have that psychosomatic itchy sensation all over.

What else? Not much- we had a bit of drama about going to school today but she went. Other than that it's pretty quiet which I hope is not how my Mom's life is because i'd feel kind of bad but she has friends in the area and works a couple of days a week and my sister is only at school until 2:30 each day so I suppose people are around but I hope she has fun.

I also think that I have a design for my website that I like so hopefully I'll have that to show you soon as well!

That is all.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

It's A Mod Mod World!

Tonight is the photo shoot for my class portfolio. The Sara(h)s have agreed to model for me. I've bought some Mod dresses which are a little reminiscent of Minnie Mouse's ensemble. The tags will not be removed so that I may return them to the store after the shoot. Ha! I'm so tacky.

After the class is done I might have my negatives scanned so that you all can see my work.

Saturday, November 10, 2007

Okay, so tonight was "Rhett, can you help me with my self-portrait assignment?" Which was really "I want to play America's Next Top Model under the guise of doing arty homework." Rhett was confused when I told him I needed to stop by the store first to pick up a pack of smokes. I was doing this whole jazz record, fedora wearing set-up and I thought a cigarrette would be apropos. I also love the way cigarrettes shoot in black and white. My association with cigarrettes isn't entirely repulsive. Both my Mom and paternal Grandmother smoked and so smoking does have a very feminine, elegant quality when the right hand holds a cigarette.

I scored some Parliment menthols for $1 at a discount liqour store's clearance bin. Anyone know why cigarrettes get clearanced? I figure $1 was about all I was willing to pay for cigarrettes that I wasn't really going to smoke. As a side note, my spare bedroom / home studio stinks despite the open window. TFMD's sister should be aware of that fact, in case she experiments with cigarrettes, which I wouldn't expect, but one never knows.

I set up the camera and told Rhett what shutter speed and aperture, but relied on his eye. I would pose and then he had the important task of making sure the shot was focused and the lens was capturing what I wanted. The last time Rhett helped me with homework it was, ironically, an Ethics paper that I kinda had him write. He earned me a D. A mother fucking D. Imagine! Earning a D on an Ethics paper, you didn't write. I hope this turns out better than the paper. I put a lot of trust in his eye.

I'm up at the unGodly hour of 3:00 (AHH the demons's hour) because my tossing and turning was disturbing Rhett. I could tell by the way he said "Are you gonna toss and turn all night or are you gonna get up?" But now I should try to creep back to bed and capture some sleep before I spend all day in the darkroom developing what might turn out to be 2 rolls of blurry images of my bedroom wall.


Oops posted last post too early before reading the rest of your blog.


Go dark my friend. Do what I DON'T have the guts to do. I'll sit here and live vicariously through your dark tresses.


Dear Clem,


Your welcome,

Friday, November 09, 2007

I’m jumping on the Blogging Bandwagon.

So when I first started this I thought it would be short bc I had nothing to say. I was wrong. Sorry this is all over the place:

Work has been busy. Budget stuff mostly. Yesterday I needed a break so I was reading something which lead me to these two lists.
50 Things Men Wish You Knew
50 Things She Wishes You Knew

I personally can say most of the Women’s list is true. Then, I made a friend look at the guy’s list and he also confirmed it’s true.
This weekend I may have to wear my hair in a pony tail while golfing and drinking beer, then go home to cook and then, ya know ;-)

Next- Books.
I just finished “The Kite Runner”
MESSED UP. I think the book was very well written, although the story was just sad and messed up. It was a super quick read, I would recommend it.
I realize it came out ages ago, but I wanted to read it before the movie came out. I’m not sure I will actually see the movie now.

Moving Along-
I have no new house or redecorating going on, so no pictures to share. Although, I have a question. What do you do if you have a squeaky bed? Well I suppose it’s the box spring or the metal thing you put the box spring on- frame maybe? But not the mattress. It’s just annoying. You sit on it- squeak. Roll over- squeak.
You get the picture. Is my only option to buy a new one?

Almost done-
I watched Grey’s last night. I think I am going to start watching it regularly. Although, drinking two glasses of wine (and not eating dinner) after a crappy day and then watching it isn’t a great idea. I was on the verge of crying. Meredith is growing on me…maybe it was just the alcohol.

I’m toying with the idea of dying my hair dark. Like chocolate brown. I think you have all seen it like this…if not I have pictures I can send.
I need thoughts….

Ok and with that I am going to eat lunch.


Goodmorning Angels!

Ok annoying- can't update my email address which means I need to sign out of my current gmail into the old gmail to post.

Secondly, had I not turned off my computer last night to concentrate full on Iron Chef America I would have posted myself and as I thought "hm i should really turn my computer back on and post." I knew I would wake up and see Scarlet had. Beating me by mere hours again AS USUAL!

But having already weighed in on her evolution discussion I found the results intriguing. Also have read Clem's NYTimes article on Telling the Stories Behind Abortion which stated 40% of women have had an abortion in their child bearing years I asked her to overlap the two figures since it's rare that two separate people come to me with staggering figures in one day but I'm sure the info is coming. :)

I planned on finding conclusive evidence that having grown up in New York and living in the NE biased my numbers (I had originally guessed 80% of the country would have believed in evolution) UNFORTUNATELY all the data out there is old.

The most recent map I could find was from 2000:

Now as you will SHOCKINGLY note New York received a C! BUUUT then if you go here you realized it's because it includes "sloppy organization and inclusion of creationist jargon. It could easily be revised into a first-rate program". I'm going to blame this on Western New York bringing the state down.

I would like to take a moment to show what they said about Kentucky and hope Scarlet's head doesn't explode: "It appears young Kentuckians are to be sheltered from any exposure to evolution and dangerous words and theories". I smell home schooling in Rhett's future! And that is where the Libertarian uprising will begin...

But in my search for evolutionary data I found this:
  • More than half of all American adults (53%) do not know that the Earth goes around the Sun once a year.
  • Nearly half (48%) do not have a sense of what percentage of the Earth's surface is covered by water.
  • And 42% can't answer correctly when asked if the earliest humans lived at the same time as dinosaurs.
  • Nearly 1 in 5 people (19%) couldn't answer any of these questions correctly.
I over guessed on the amount of water covering the earth (which I also had to research) but I think it was close enough that I'm considering myself knowledgeable.

And since I'm on a role of careless disregard in hot-button topics I recommend everyone take this happy little quiz that Scarlet gave me when she and Mr. Darcy were berating me for not wanted to get changed into real clothes and go out and vote. WHICH might I add tricked me into thinking I could vote for presidential candidates which was untrue (and very confusing at the time) when I did in fact get dressed in real clothes and go out to vote. I was fairly certain that my quiz was going to come back and say "peace and happiness, little moonbeam. buddha loves you and thinks you should vote soon because your Venus is in retrograde" which it did not but does make me want to find my Hair cd before my drive to Albany... Yes I own a Hair cd. Hmm everyone knows that's a hippie american tribal love-rock musical... yes? Sometimes I say things and I feel people looking at me with the same questioning as when I said "it's Wiccan" when my co-workers were trying to say "witch craft" about another employee. Hair is how my friends and I scared Hare Krishnas in Quincy Market on our 8th grade trip to Boston by singing Hare Krishna along with them. Apparently not many white suburbanite girls knew the song.

Oh in other news the area we walk to most often- Davis Square- had a Guinness book attempt at the most number of Witches doing a reading at the same time the weekend before Halloween. No reports on whether it was successful or not. And that is what a couple lines of latitude and an extremely close proximity to Salem will do for you.

Now that my Dennis Miller rant is dying down I'll mention that I'm really enjoying Boston. We can walk to things. Our place is really nice- photos on facebook. I love love love working from home. The ole wedding invite business is rolling along. I just finished a 2 day project of creating a photo/vendor review with tons of pictures website to put on the Knot as a (hopeful) way to drum up some interest and business. All next week I will be reporting live from Albany while I watch after my sister when my mom is in Italy because my stepfather doesn't think he's up to the task... Yeah don't get me started on that one but I'm being paid so woo-hoo money coming in is always good. Speaking of I need to finish tidying up then get on the road!


I realize that last post was a bit harsh, but I'm having a difficult time assimilating myself with the conversative relm of P-town society. One older female classmate of mine was telling me about her two sons. The youngest son, a highschool senior, is choosing a college and thinks he wants to attend a music college in Boston. The mother doesn't want him to go, because Boston is too liberal. The other, attends a private college in KY. He was shocked to find that the college employs faculty, who, get this: believe in EVOLUTION! Oh the horrors!

This got me thinking: What percentage of Americans believe in Evolution?
So, I did a little research. Typing evolution into Google gives a lot of results. I tried to find the most credible source. Here is a survey found on National Geographic.

This chart depicts the public acceptance of evolution theory in 34 countries in 2005. Adults were asked to respond to the statement: "Human beings, as we know them, developed from earlier species of animals." The percentage of respondents who believed this to be true is marked in blue; those who believed it to be false, in red; and those who were not sure, in yellow.

A study of several such surveys taken since 1985 has found that the United States ranks next to last in acceptance of evolution theory among nations polled. Researchers point out that the number of Americans who are uncertain about the theory's validity has increased over the past 20 years.

Chart courtesy Jon Miller, et al./Science

To read the whole article click here.

Before I found this survey, I asked Rhett for his opinion. He guessed 50%. TFMD guessed 80%.

For the record, the last Pope said that one can simultaneously believe in the bible and evolution. A very progressive stance from a church who historical oppressed scientific thought, in my humble opinion.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

I hate the late 40 to 50 year old women in my class who gave up independence to be a wife and mother in their 20's, but now they are feeling an empty nest so they've decided to pursuit their own interests and become an "artist." These bitches are getting on my nerves. Not only do they spent four times the amount of time in the darkroom, prolly burning through $16 of paper per assignment (due weekly) but they think they are the only effing one's taking the class. Hey bitch, it's my turn to present, could you stop talking about your work for 5 minutes. No I don't care that you think I should have cropped, or enlarged or printed vertically. Although your unsolicited advice is fuel for my hatred of women like you, I don't see how taking the drawing or oil painting class would make me a better photographer. I realize that you perceive the ambiguous sexual orientation of the art department's head as non-threatening and get off on the attention that he pays you, because your husband is a dick who hasn't paid you any mind since you smother him with your motherly ways, but the art department head is so obviously gay, but you're too stupid and inexperienced to notice. Oh and if you put two and two together, that your teacher is gay and not in the "happy" sense but in the "he has sex w/ men" sense then you're brain will prolly explode. You'll think you've been tainted and will go take an anonymous AIDS test through the mail, because you're a bigotted homophobe and I HATE YOU! And the worst thing I can wish upon you is a liberal child.

Angry in P-town